Build you own conspiracy
20/05/20 09:42
The world is awash with conspiracies – we know this because conspirators tell us this and if challenged say that if there is no evidence of a conspiracy then this constitutes absolute proof that something is clearly being hidden from us – otherwise we would know. Defies the gravitational pull of facts and cam cause dizziness and attacks of virtual vertigo.
How long is a piece of string theory? The short answer is “a cosmological theory based on the existence of cosmic strings. The longer answer is that those strings move and vibrate at different frequencies, giving particles distinctive properties like mass and charge. This strange idea could unite all the fundamental forces, explain the origins of fundamental particles and connect Einstein's general relativity to quantum mechanics”. First clarification - general relativity is nothing to do with distant cousins and quantum mechanics is not when a mechanic tells you that car repair is going to cost four times more than you can afford. The word also has a Q as in Quixotic – denoting the tilting at windmills in the mistaken belief they are giants.
Let’s untangle this string theory to find the shape of a conspiracy.
Point one – nobody but scientists understand it – so it must be kind of secret.
Point two - all that cosmic stuff makes it immediately very suspicious.
Point Three - if asked President Trump would say it is a possible cure for the coronavirus and be making macramé hats in the Oval Office.
Point Four – string has knots and tax loop holes that only the elite know because they are rich and have sail boats that are secretly powered by tax breaks.
Point Four – final key to conspiracy – nobody can actually tell you how long a piece of string is which is a sure sign.
There are some who would accuse those who believe in conspiracy theories of being idiots. This a bit unfair. It is not that simple being idiot – it takes long ours of trolling the internet to find things to fit into a DIY conspiracy so just finding one that suits your lifestyle is much easier – then you don’t have even have to bother with troublesome things like facts or science.
Terry Sarten is a writer, musician and is not a conspiracy but don’t tell everyone.
Let’s untangle this string theory to find the shape of a conspiracy.
Point one – nobody but scientists understand it – so it must be kind of secret.
Point two - all that cosmic stuff makes it immediately very suspicious.
Point Three - if asked President Trump would say it is a possible cure for the coronavirus and be making macramé hats in the Oval Office.
Point Four – string has knots and tax loop holes that only the elite know because they are rich and have sail boats that are secretly powered by tax breaks.
Point Four – final key to conspiracy – nobody can actually tell you how long a piece of string is which is a sure sign.
There are some who would accuse those who believe in conspiracy theories of being idiots. This a bit unfair. It is not that simple being idiot – it takes long ours of trolling the internet to find things to fit into a DIY conspiracy so just finding one that suits your lifestyle is much easier – then you don’t have even have to bother with troublesome things like facts or science.
Terry Sarten is a writer, musician and is not a conspiracy but don’t tell everyone.